A New Chapter Begins

by | Sep 18, 2009

The Birth of a New Love
She was only a year and a half old and had been in the shelter for almost a year, joining the other homeless pets there as a stray. She quickly became a staff favorite with her darling little personality. Moreover, while she did not hate living at the Humane Society of Indianapolis with all of her little kitty friends, it was her forever home that she kept hoping for. A home that she could run and play in, a home that had sunbeams she could lie in, and a home with a family that would love her.

And, then it happened! One day her cute little face, with the little gray spot resembling a “mole,” caught a young woman´s eye. Well, really, maybe it was not her face – maybe it was her expressive and pleading little kitty eyes that actually told the story. Nonetheless, – she had been spotted – and her life was soon going to change!

Oh, goodness me! It was truly love at first sight! Nevertheless, like any love that is new in its relationship – she had to figure out her new mommy and her new mommy had to figure out what was important to her new little kitty! But, love it was!

Life changed – and moved into complete and utter bliss! Molly soon developed what her Mommy calls “Miss Molly Attitude” and quickly began to make herself right at home with her new family. Every day the love grows – and every day there are more stories of what adventure has happened that day. The biggest event making news right now – the 4:30 am wake up calls for her Mommy by Molly having fun with the plastic bags in the trash cans! We all know that the most fun toys are those that cost us nothing! Ah – the joy!

Thank you, my beautiful sweet stepdaughter, for opening your heart to this love! Your life will forever be changed with Molly as your little girl. She will see your physical and career moves, be a part of the next phase of your life and those relationships, see you get married, have children – and will be a part of some of the most exciting things to happen in your life! This will truly be a precious chapter in this awesome story known as “Amy´s Life!” I love you, Amy and Miss Molly!

A New Chapter Begins

The Second Most Memorable Day For A Pet Parent

by | Jul 16, 2009

The Second Most Memorable Day For A Pet Parent

As I sat in the sun last evening, enjoying the beauty of the night and the warm light breeze, I glanced down to see my big Golden Retriever, Mike The Dog, also basking in our Maker´s greatness. With Secret Garden softly playing in the background, I looked at his peaceful big white face and it hit me.

According to the story, “A Living Legend,” there are three days in a pet parent´s life that you will always remember. The first is the day that your precious little furry friend came home! The joy of a new life together! The fun in seeing them adapt to their new family! The realization that, either again or for the first time in your life – your heart was about to be surrendered and stolen and you would know and feel the meaning of the words “unconditional love.” Oh – the joy!

Then the second most memorable day comes. That second day, while I have known that it has been lurking on the sidelines for quite some time due to the gradual change in routine with the addition of vitamins, “senior” supplements, and additional “senior” care, hit me hard last night as I watched this big-love of a Golden-bear sleeping. It is the day where, as a Pet Parent, you finally see “old.” His big white face. That big sweet old white face. There it is. Staring me in the face. A gentle reminder that seemed to say, “Love me today – for I don´t know how much longer I have here in this earthly existence.”

God knows, today I have been different because of yesterday, the day that the second most memorable day showed up. Time is so precious. Time is so short. I will not allow one minute passing without Mike The Dog knowing that I love him.

With all of my heart.

As I know that third most memorable day is not far off.

When will my heart let me adopt another pet?

by | Jun 10, 2009

When will my heart let me adopt another pet?

When someone experiences the death of a pet, the first question that well-meaning friends and family members will ask is “when are you getting another pet?”  You may possibly be asking yourself this question, too.  However there is some work that needs to be done before you are even in an emotional state to be ready to address this.

The question of “when will you be getting another pet” is really second behind another issue that needs to be addressed.  “Have you done your mourning  work first?”

Definitely the first step to be addressed with your heart is the “mourning work” that will move you into your new normal regarding the pet that died.  In our grief work, we first need to recognize that the word “grief” is actually our inward thoughts with the loss of a loved one.  “Mourning” is our outward thoughts – the actions that are done to move us through to Grief Resolution.

My first recommendation would be for you to actively mourn the loss of your pet that died six months ago.  The Six Needs of Mourning The Death of a Pet can best be summed up with the acronym “AARFFF.”  These needs are:

Acknowledge the reality of the death.
Allow yourself to be dosed with the reality that this death has occurred – bring yourself to the acknowledgement in your own time frame through “active mourning.”
Allow yourself to hurt.
Hurting will allow you to heal.
Remember your pet.
Memorialize your pet in the manner that best represents the lifestyle that you and your pet shared together.  A simple walk in the park, the planting of a tree or flower, lighting a candle, journaling, or even a memorial service to honor the life that you shared together are all good ways to remember and pay tribute to this love in your life.
Find your new role (responsibilities) in a life without this pet.
Through actively mourning, you will move to a new “normal” in a life without this pet.
Fact and feeling finding for your heart.
Let your heart guide you through this journey.  Your head will try to rationalize your feelings but your heart will let you feel, and hurt, your way to healing.
Find your friends for support – those friends that will empathize with your loss and understand loving a pet.
Bring those that understand the love of a pet close to you for support.  For those that don´t understand this love, you will need to temporarily tuck that relationship away until you heal.

When your mourning work is done, your heart will be ready to love and adopt again.  Your heart will know when that time has come.